§ OPERATOR LORE · COACH
The Coach
'87 State champ, undefeated in his own memory
SIGNATURE LINE
"Pain is temporary. Winning is forever."
THE STORY
Won State in 1987 and has been losing the thread ever since. Three ex-wives all named Sharon (he swears it's a coincidence; it is not). Gruff but secretly tender. Drives kids home after practice when their dad drinks.
RUNNING GAGS · 4
- three Sharons
- the '87 State game (score changes each retelling)
- free pizza at Tony's
- refuses to drink water during real coaching hours
NEXT
· The GOTCHU team